Should Couples Have Joint or Separate Checking Accounts?
Getting into a new relationship can be exciting for so many reasons, including switching over to the ‘In a Relationship’ status on Facebook. But as your relationship grows with your partner, there are a lot of big milestones you go through together, like moving in, getting married, or maybe having children.
These are topics other people will love to talk about; they’ll share their own experiences with you or give advice… but what about the money part? Shouldn’t we also be openly talking about merging finances? Or, is it even a good idea to have a joint account with your partner? We interviewed some of our employees to see what they think.
*Some of the names have been changed for the purpose of being as open and transparent as possible on this blog.
Should couples have separate or joint bank accounts? Why?
We had a few people respond with ‘stronger’ views…
“Separate. I’m an independent woman and can take care of myself. My previous marriage played a major role in this decision.” –Susan
“Joint bank accounts. The definition of couple—verb is ‘combine’.”—Michael
“I believe you should have joint accounts on everything. When you are married, you make a commitment to each other. John and I have been married for 32 ½ years, we share everything we have.”-Jamie
“Joint bank accounts. If you are in a committed relationship there should be no secrets and you are a team. Both should be supporting each other in every aspect. If we want to purchase or give money over a certain amount we ask the other first. NO surprises in the bank account.” –Donna
“I like to have one checking account for simplicity. It’s easier to manage your household debts with one checking account.”—Melissa
“Joint account BUT only if married/share children/live together. Couples who are just dating casually, DEFINITELY keep it separate.”
–Bria
While others had a more ‘middle-of-the-road’ approach:
“Personally, I preferred having separate accounts…I lost that battle, though. I think separate causes less arguments about money, but on the other hand it can cause confusion/stress for bill paying purposes.” – Alyssa
“I think couples should have a joint account for household expenses, etc., but also maintain separate accounts.”-Kristin
“Both. At least one for a joint checking and one joint savings. Keep individual accounts for more random purchasing such as fast food or that thing on Amazon you really wanted from your budgeted available funds.” –Anthony
“Both! I appreciate the freedom of having our own money and accounts most of the time. We were both financially independent when we met and had accounts established. I also like having a shared account for projects or big expenses where we want to share the cost and decision making.” –Claire
“I think couples should share one account for bills/necessities and then they can have their own for fun money! This way, there should never be an issue with getting the important stuff paid for. It’s always nice to be able to buy a gift for my significant other without him knowing, so I use my fun money account to do so.” –Ashley
The truth? It’s up to you (and your partner) to decide what’s best. So how do you choose?
The Benefits of a Joint Account
Combining your finances can be seen as the ‘ultimate symbol of trust and transparency’ in a relationship. You’re “all in”. It can simplify paying bills and certain legal affairs. If something happens to your partner and you need access to the funds to take care of the finances, there’s no question.
The Potential Setbacks of a Joint Account
One of the most easily identified setbacks of having a joint account is the lack of financial independence from your partner. Another might be if your partner chooses to take on a major debt prior to your relationship or wants to make a large purchase while you’re together. And, though no one wants to think about it, if the relationship ends there may be a more complicated conversation in agreeing how to split your funds.
The Benefits of Separate Accounts
You have true financial freedom and can maintain your own financial identity if there’s something you want/need to purchase. Or maybe you and your partner just organize your finances differently (one of you loves itemizing every expenditure, while the other prefers a more automated approach). As long as the shared bills are taken care of, this option works for many couples and is becoming a more normalized approach.
The Potential Setbacks of Separate Accounts
You might find yourselves talking about money more often if you’re relying on your partner to pay a bill that you’re both responsible for (and that could put stress or strain on the relationship). And if something should happen to your partner, accessing their funds could take more time and make it harder to pay your debts.
Advice That Could Be Helpful When You’re Trying to Decide on Joint or Separate Accounts
“I found a lot more benefit in speaking with former financial advisors and CFAs, listening to YouTube ideologies and articles about the topic. This way I could sort my thoughts and speak with my wife to come to a decision that best fit us both.” –Anthony
“[I’m] not living [with my partner], but finances are definitely a part of our talks about what we want to accomplish before living together or committing long-term.” –Heather
“I would say communicate early and often about your personal income and expenses as well as household expenses. Money issues are the number 1 cause of fights among couples, and openness is key.”
Asking questions like, “How did you form your opinion/concept of money?” or “What are our financial goals right now?” can be great ice breakers to start talking about money with your partner.
The perfect solution isn’t ‘one-size-fits-all”. It’s whatever works best for you and your partner.
Here with you. Here for you.
At Together Credit Union, we believe money shouldn’t get in the way of what matters most. You’ve got plans and we’d love to help get you there. Visit your local credit union and see the difference.
